G20 ‘Anarchists’ Really Piss Me Off

This past week at Toronto’s G20 Summit, the usual “black bloc anarchists” gave real anarchists a bad name. After all, what would a riot or protest be without blaming it on the anarchists, socialists, or any other marginalized group that is deemed to be fringe? There are government provocateurs who are hell bent on inspiring whole groups of people to raise up and fight the Man by smashing windows and torching cop cars. However, there are also plenty of ordinary people who feel the need to rebel in the exact same way:  by violence. And what is most frustrating of all is that these abject morons call themselves “anarchists.”

Regardless of whether or not they could actually name a single anarchist philosopher, or whether they could form a coherent and logical defense of anarchism, the “anarchists” suit up in their black attire and raze city blocks with no discretion or thought. In fact, what these protesters did in Seattle in the 90’s, in Pittsburgh last year, and in Toronto this past weekend is so fundamentally opposed to anarchism that it is laughable.

Anarchism is a stateless society. People have to learn how to interact with one another peacefully and civilly. There is no compulsion or coercion in an anarchist society, unless, of course, it is criminal. Just as in our current state, the only justifiable force is that used in self-defense. So, to put it mildly, when those black bloc lunatics smash the storefront of a mom and pop store, or burn a soccer mom’s van, what type of message are they trying to send? If their goal is a stateless society, one devoid of an entity that steals, murders, and coerces, then they best change their tactics. The reason being that if they are willing to attack and harm innocent establishments/bystanders, they are becoming exactly the type of monster that they are so “courageously fighting.”

My gripe with them does not end there. For the most part, these “anarchists” are outright cowards. They act as if they’re the hardest kids to hit the street since NWA, but this couldn’t be further from the truth. God forbid any of them reveal their faces as they carry out their “propaganda of the deed.” Then again, none of them would want to ruin their chances of getting a job, going to grad school, or doing countless other conventional things; because as soon as they pull off that black mask of theirs, most go back complacently and quietly into their cage in society. Weekends with big protests like the G20 allow these faux-anarchists to “blow off some steam,” most likely built up from years of being “misunderstood” by their parents or never outgrowing their outrage developed from years of listening to grunge

However, I must say that it is always fun to watch their antics. Wearing skin-tight jeans that would put spandex in its place, black eyeliner (for guys and girls alike), and an overpriced, possibly designer, bandana, these twig thin thugs need to hurl roughly 7 cinder blocks at paper thin glass to merely crack it (lest we forget, it probably takes five of these “anarchists” to merely lift one). Their chants are often meaningless, poorly synced, and could easily be defeated, in both originality and audibleness, by a girls’ softball team. What is even funnier to watch are clashes between the black bloc and the overzealous police force (As an aside, the behavior of the Toronto/Canadian authorities this past weekend was outright atrocious with a blatant disregard of the protesters’ rights and the rule of the law).

Superiorly armed criminals (the police) line up against inferiorly armed criminals (the black bloc) in straight line formations that haven’t been used since the Revolutionary War. Bricks, stones, and other everyday objects are hurled against rubber bullets, batons, and sound and water cannons. It is almost as if Darwin’s Theory of Natural Selection is being tested in front of my own very eyes:  Two groups of mindless morons duke it out to the death. I can’t complain.

Let me finish by saying this, I am a long term anarchist with short term solutions (Thank you, Nick Hankoff). I would have gladly stood beside my fellow anarchists at the G20 to protest the thugs and criminals that we call world “leaders.” But I will not tolerate provocateurs or people calling themselves anarchists who violate the very principles that they “advocate.” These black bloc bozos have given the anarchist movement a bad name for far too long. Next time you see them, call them out for what they are:  violent criminals.

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