No Love for Miniluv

The Department of Homeland Security — a gargantuan leviathan of alphabet soup agencies: TSA, FEMA, USCIS, ICE, USSS, etc. — is undergoing a change of leadership with the resignation of Janet “Big Sis” Napolitano.

Serving under the Obama administration since 2009, Napolitano has been ravaged by attacks from both political parties, from supporters of state action and civil libertarians alike, who have lampooned and demonized the agency since its creation in 2002 under George W. Bush.

From the beginning, the agency’s mandate to protect “the homeland” was too unwieldy and bureaucratic. It managed everything from immigration to airport security, from disaster relief to secret service operations, protecting the American people from “enemy combatants” in the “war on terror” and “war on drugs” (and the yet-to-be-coined war on Sharknados?).

In short, the secretary of Miniluv had her work cut out for her.

She was assailed by Democrats for her draconian deportation program and derided by Republicans for her lax enforcement of border security. She was lauded for her replacement of the security color-code system, only to be styled a child molester for initiating enhanced pat-downs of six-year-olds. And all she wanted to do was protect Americans from terrorists entering the nation by the mountainous wilderness that is the Canadian border. Perhaps the secretary just needs her own summer of love in the land of milk and honey.

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